Russian weirdo with knife!


My eyesight improved enough tonight to allow me to go out with Kev and Otherphil for a few drinks and bowling in Crawley.

It’s a sad thing, but one of mty two mantras is “I want more life fucker!”, a line from Bladerunner. Tonight, I got what Roy Baty wanted…more life. I won both lanes in spite of my damaged eyesight and then, Kev and Otherphil went to shoot some pool while I chatted up Faye and Leanne, a couple of student nurses. Bless them, we were having a good chat when “Yuri” turned up, complete with Russian accent and a small flick-knife which he brandished at us.

Since my cancer scare, I have been very much less scared than I ever used to be, so I asked Yuri if he was a hard man. Leanne disappeared leaving Faye and me to fight the cold war. I tried to persuade Yuri that he would have more success with girls if he did not threaten them with knives. Yuri looked a lot like Robert Carlyle (Full Monty & Bond Villain). After holding Yuri at bay for a while, security arrived and Yuri took off, as fast as possible.

Kev and Otherphil were blissfully unaware of the developments, so I had to regale them with the whole story. They were sceptical, but I knew it happened and I helped keep those girls safe, so I’m happy.

Later, we saw Yuri at Dominos (he was too late). I pointed him out to the lads, but by then we were tucking into the pizza and heading for the train. Home time. Good-bye weirdo!

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